World's most gorgeous Geordie bird

Gina McKee.

The library had nothing more interesting than the 2002 Forsyte Saga where she plays Irene to Damien Lewis's Soames. The roles played, for those old enough to remember, by Nyree Dawn Porter and Eric Porter (no relation) in the original BBC series.

So that's what I got. Lewis is a ginge, and was I believe m'Lud prominent in something called Band of Brothers. Gina was in Us Friends Oop North, which is where I first saw her. She was also in Brass Eye, video of which is available.

Amazingly, she's now 46, like my little brother. She looks a lot better than he does, even given he's a bloke. I would, as Sir John Gielgud once said, do her. She wouldn't give me the time of fucking day, goes without saying.